why even try?

I don't know why I even try to have a relationship. They all turn out to be absolute crap. It must mean there's something wrong with me but I couldn't begin to think what it is unless I'm too nice. I give 110% in every relationship and it still never seems to be enough. I don't get it. I cook I clean, I will put up with your shitty ass friends who talk shit about me, I will make them food too even though they treat me like crap and you don't say shit!! I don't really get jealous or snoopy unless you give me a reason to be. I don't care if you hang out with your friends, just don't blow off plans we already had. Which is normal, no one LIKES being blown off. I will give up things that I feel would make me happy in order for you to have a better life. That's got to be it. Men think I'm a doormat. Well not any more! If I ever happen to give another man the time of day he's going to know from day one you don't play games with me. If you can't handle that then too bad for you because I am a strong woman!

But that's a  big if. I plan on just getting a dog. Men aren't dogs, that's insulting to dogs. Dogs are sweet loyal, loving creatures who will always have your back. They will fight for you and protect you. Men are more like cats. They like you when it's convenient for them, when they can get something out of it. Otherwise they're just there. They're lazy and self absorbed just like every cat I have ever met. And not to mention shady. Cats will attack you for no reason and pee on your shit and men will metaphorically do the same thing. Just when you think everything is going okay you find out shits not as great as you think it is. I'm done dealing with men. I already have a cat I don't need another one. But I could use a loyal loving companion.

As I'm sure you've figure the boyfriend and I are no longer, basically. I wanted to talk about it but just like a man he hasn't said shit yet. And I'm not waiting for forever. I deserve someone to treat me the way I treat them. With love, understanding, acceptance, and a mutual effort. So luckily I should be able to move out within a few months now. I won't be spending all my money on a worthless mooch who only says thank you when you ask. I hope he gets whats coming to him too. I hope the next girl he dates is just a ragging bitch, but knowing him he'll want to marry her just like he did the last one. But when he finds a good woman what does he do? Treat her like shit. Makes total sense...NOT!! I'm not saying I wanted to get married but I would've liked him to take it seriously!